My Life in the Darkness

Awaken

2008-05-04T13:05:00.003-04:00

I have slept
I have slumbered
Through days
Unnumbered

And all the while
I dreamed of you...

I stir
I awaken
With my confidence
Shaken

I will find my way
Back to you....

Resolution

2007-01-05T11:40:00.000-05:00

The old year passes
But my love has not
died with it

I am here, my love
Watching you
In your lonliness
In your sadness
In this time
of need

I will love you, always
She doesn't know
What she's lost

You will be mine

Sounds

2006-09-04T15:25:00.000-04:00

How you turn a phrase
How you speak a word
The most beautiful sounds
I have ever heard

Missing You

2006-09-03T05:22:00.000-04:00

So thoughtful
So gentle
So kind

Ever here
In my heart
In my mind

So distant
So parted
So far

How I wish
How I want
To be where you are

Essence

2006-09-02T14:20:00.000-04:00

I go anyway
Even knowing you're not there
Your essence lingers

Dreams

2006-08-31T14:18:00.000-04:00

To hold you
To love you
To keep you
To bind you
To know that you are ever mine
These are my dreams

Shhhh

2006-08-30T09:18:00.000-04:00

Rest, my love
Rest your words
There is no need
For them here

In your silence
I still hear you
And I know

Druid

2006-08-29T15:43:00.000-04:00

Wind blowing
Across the hills
I hear your name
Whispered in the trees

I love you all the move
For sending to me
Such a reminder
On the breeze

As if I could forget you
My Druid
My Love

Say You Love Me

2006-08-27T18:39:00.000-04:00

To watch you
To know you
To know your heart
Better than you do
To feel a love
That you deny
Let me be the one to show you
What it is to love

Say you love me
So that you know it too

The Noisy Party

2006-08-26T23:54:00.000-04:00

Chatter chatter
Bicker and bitch
Surrounded in conversations
Lost in which is which

Points of view
That matter not to me
But as long as you're here
It's where I want to be

Stripes

2006-08-25T22:28:00.000-04:00

Soul of a tiger
Hidden in smaller body
But I see your stripes

Effleurage

2006-08-24T23:09:00.000-04:00

Your touch
Like that of a sculptor
Moving
Molding
Healing
Creating
Destroying
How good it feels
To be under
Your touch

Silence as Water

2006-08-23T22:30:00.000-04:00

The silence here
Between your words
Makes me frantic
And yet
I treasure them
So very
very
much more
When you do speak

Like the sweetness of water
To one dying in the desert
Is the sweetness of your words
To me

Let me drink of your life

Creation

2006-08-22T19:48:00.000-04:00

You create with your hands
Things that you give with love
You create with your words
Things that have never existed at all

Is there anything you cannot do?

Intimacy of Friends

2006-08-21T10:32:00.000-04:00

The intimacy of friends
It is a beautiful and powerful thing
How they hug you
How they hold you
How they laugh with you
How they play with you
With love from the heart
But not love like mine

Let me love you

Time

2006-08-20T11:53:00.000-04:00

It cannot possibly be
That they cherish
Dream of
Wish for
Cry over
Time spent with you
Like I do
And yet
There you go
Sharing your experiences
With them instead

Waiting

2006-08-19T12:50:00.000-04:00

I waited
But you never came
I watched
Unwilling to show the others
That I was there
Waiting for you
And I waited
But you never came

I forgive you

See You Soon

2006-08-18T14:32:00.000-04:00

So excited
Knowing I will see you
Knowing I will share the space
That you breathe in
I can barely stand
The waiting
The knowing
That it is almost
Time.

Insomnia

2006-08-17T18:45:00.000-04:00

Alone without sleep
As darkness enfolds your form
I dream of your eyes

Empathy

2006-08-16T15:44:00.000-04:00

Your tender heart
Shattered
By such a cruel world
As this
Your empathy
Makes my heart hurt
And makes me long
To hold you
Stroke your weary eyes
And make it all
So much better a world
Just for you

In Your Life

2006-08-15T16:36:00.000-04:00

Do those in your life
Understand what it is to
Be those in your life?

The Power of Words

2006-08-14T00:07:00.000-04:00

Words have power.

I have long thought
That I had the power over words.
But I was wrong.

Looking back at the foolish things
Things I have done
For words
Words that mislead me
Words like "I love you".
Words like "forever".

I never controlled them.
But it comforted me to believe that I did.
And so I wrote.
I called myself writer.
And believed that it was I
Who mastered the words.

And now, I watch you.
As the words fall from your lips.
Your tongue, silver and sharp.
But your words, so gentle.
Easing a smile from my wary heart.

So easy for you
The words
You own them

And through them
You own me.

Wanderer, Companion

2006-08-11T23:03:00.000-04:00

Wanderer
Now companion

You walked into my life
Strong
Brave
Powerful
You saved me from a beast
Rescued me from the tower
And I am ever yours

Wanderer
Companion
Beloved

Flame

2006-08-10T23:34:00.000-04:00

I watch the flame dance
Flickering candle light
My world
Lit only by the candle
By this screen
By your existence
I bask in the light of you

Secret Smile

2006-08-09T22:17:00.000-04:00

A soft, secret smile
Thinking of the things you said
Last night in my dream

Words

2006-08-08T21:25:00.000-04:00

I read your words
Hunger for the description
Of your life
Of your world
With a voracity that
I was unprepared for

Tell me everything
Let me know you
Through your precious,
Precious
Words

Rain

2006-08-07T19:32:00.000-04:00

Rain falls softly
Little trails of water
Running down the window panes
I watch them
Little drops falling down
Rain nurturing the plants
Bringing the land to life
And I smile
Thinking of you

Wherever You Are

2006-08-06T18:26:00.000-04:00

A soft dreamy sigh
How I wish I were with you
Wherever you are

Send

2006-08-05T13:15:00.000-04:00

Moving almost against my will
I type the message to you
A love letter in your e-mail
Will you hear the love in my words?
Will you find my heart between the lines?
I am afraid
I am excited
I hit "send"

Answer

2006-08-04T02:10:00.000-04:00

Wild eyed
And wondering
Calling your name
My love, do you hear me?
Will you answer the call
Of my heart?

Do You?

2006-08-03T03:12:00.000-04:00

Do you feel me?
Do you feel my heart?
As you sleep, can you hear me?
Do you hear me whisper your name?

Soulmate

2006-08-02T03:05:00.000-04:00

Soft his eyes
Light his gaze
Deep his voice
Kind his smile
Joyful his laugh

Soulmate, I have finally found you

Right Now?

2006-08-01T02:02:00.000-04:00

I fret
I fidget
I wonder

What is he doing... right now?
What is he thinking about... right now?
Is he reading?
Is he writing?
Is he sleeping?
Is he dreaming?
... like I am dreaming of him?

I fret
I fidget
I wonder

Brown Eyes

2006-07-30T03:04:00.000-04:00

In soft brown eyes
I see myself
Reflected in a way
I never knew
Such kindness
Such depth
Such gentleness
I have just met you
Yet I have always known you
In my dreams

He Knew

2006-07-29T23:12:00.000-04:00

He knew...
...the right words
...the right smile
...the right look
...the right laugh

He knew...
... he knew my name

Lost

2006-07-20T01:34:00.000-04:00

My words
My voice
Lost
In the bitter peal
In the vicious cacophony
In the clanging chimes
Of your wedding bells

White Lace Shroud

2006-07-19T23:31:00.000-04:00

My heart lies broken
Wrapped in a veil of white lace
A shroud for my soul

My Everything

2006-07-17T23:17:00.000-04:00

Fires burn
Tears sting
Wedding comes
Birds sing
Veil falls
Shining ring
How could you
My everything

Ever Yours

2006-07-15T00:31:00.000-04:00

While you swear to her
That you will never leave her
I swear it to you

After

2006-07-14T00:17:00.000-04:00

You tell me you love her
And you will prove it
With white lace
And meaningless vows
And guests who don't know
That you don't really love the woman
That woman behind the veil
You love me
As much as I love you

We'll discuss it after the honeymoon
I promise

She

2006-07-13T00:18:00.000-04:00

I am pretty
I am smart
I have nice eyes
I have a great smile
I make you laugh
I like things you like
I go places you like to go
I worship you
I love you
I would do anything for you

All the things she has going for her,
I have too.

So what has she got,
That I don't.

Okay, fine. BESIDES you.

I Know

2006-07-11T02:49:00.000-04:00

I know that you love me
I know that you care
I know you can't show it
I know you can't tell me
But I can feel it
And it is enough
That I just know

Run

2006-07-10T23:30:00.000-04:00

You run away from me
And I watch you go
Not because I don't care
Not because I will not have you
But because you are so beautiful to see
Muscles moving beneath skin
Hair in the wind that speeds past you
You are so beautiful when you run
Especially when you run from me

Distant Sun

2006-07-09T23:27:00.000-04:00

My love for you burns
Like the fire of a distant sun
Just a glimmer in your vast sky
Unimportant
Unnoticed
Uncharted
Unvalued
It can do nothing but burn

The stars do not care
If they are noticed
If they are appreciated
Or what they are called
They just are
Their light just burns
Burns like my love for you

Love You More

2006-07-08T02:28:00.000-04:00

I could not love you more
Not if you were taller
Not if you were richer
Not if you were sweeter
Not if you were funnier

I could not love you more
Not even if you were mine

Passion Required

2006-07-06T00:27:00.000-04:00

I do not hate you
Hate requires more passion
Than I have for you

Family

2006-07-04T00:00:00.000-04:00

You see me
And yet you do not see me
You hear me speak
And yet you do not hear me
You hold me close
And yet you do not touch me
How can we be family
When you don't even know who I am?

Sleep

2006-07-03T00:25:00.000-04:00

Sleep your peaceful sleep
And dream your peaceful dreams
I see you there
Beside her
Sleeping
Never knowing that I'm here
Never knowing that I watch
Never knowing that I know
That you love me
As much as I love you.

Antigone's Cave

2006-07-01T01:20:00.000-04:00

My soul hangs limp
At the end of a swaying, creaking rope.
(Rope provided by you, though for other cause.)
The sound echoing off the stone walls
Loud as gunshot to my ears
But heard by no other
My soul dies here
Alone
Like Antigone died.
Alone in her cave.

Still

2006-06-30T06:02:00.000-04:00

Still as my heart
When I saw you
Still as the unbroken night
Still as the morning's
Undisturbed snow
Still as a lake
Untouched by the wind
Still as my body
As my soul slips away

Let me die for you.

The Color of Hatred

2006-06-29T01:14:00.000-04:00

Behind my eyes
White
The only color is white
Burning, white fire
When I close my eyes
And think of you.

The color of hatred is not red.
It is searing
Burning
White.

Tinsel

2006-06-28T01:57:00.000-04:00

Alone
In this blackness
Where you've left me
Where my world once shone like the sun
There is only the faded
False
Glint of old
Discarded
Tinsel
Laying useless the day after Xmas.

The world darkens a little
Against the glimmer of your false smile.

Broken Inside

2006-06-26T22:13:00.000-04:00

In my sorrow
In my grief
These pieces fall away
Like sand through my fingers
They leave me
Just as you did
Broken inside
Hollow
Dead